


For the Fairest

by swan_tower (russian_blue)



Category: Greek and Roman Mythology
Genre: Gen, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-29
Updated: 2011-12-29
Packaged: 2017-10-28 10:20:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 167
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/306854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/russian_blue/pseuds/swan_tower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Really, the apple can only be meant for one person.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For the Fairest

_For the fairest_ , the inscription read. It spread discord aplenty, as intended. The goddesses squabbled and shrieked, and if beauty were judged to be internal as well as external, none of them were terribly pretty in that moment. The gods knew better than to get directly involved. They passed that responsibility to a mortal, and washed their hands of the whole affair.

The three front-runners, meanwhile, offered the best bribes they could think up: wisdom, power, love. Any normal man would have given his left arm for any one of the three. But the judge was not a normal man, and the squabbling goddesses—as well as the one who had thrown the apple in the first place—failed to take into account the truly phenomenal size of his ego.

 _For the fairest_ , the inscription read. The prince of Troy, handsome even in his rustic shepherd’s garb, buffed the apple’s golden surface, nodded in approval at his reflection, and smiled at the goddesses as he walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in _Son and Foe_ #1, December 11th, 2005. Since I now have it up for free on my [website](http://www.swantower.com/index.html), though, I figured I might as well post it here.
> 
> And yes, this might have something to do with the motif of "still the prettiest" surrounding Orlando Bloom, and the fact that he played Paris in _Troy_.


End file.
